We accompanied mom to see the doctor yesterday. Then we went to the seafood restaurant–mom loves crabs. After all these sad moments happened lately, I was happy to see that mom can still find something she liked to eat. Our family friend and I talked to the doctor in private. The doctor said mom’s condition now is better than the first time he met her, but he reminded us that her illness would worsen. I am aware of that, in fact I am living in panic every day. I see mom every day, cheering her up but at the back of my mind I know mom will leave me in no time. SAD.
Today’s headline is —
KC is tempted to look for a job that bores her to death. Why? So she can have more time doing her creative writing self-training project, and take care of her dear mother.
I have been working at the same job for almost two years since my graduation. It’s time to turn to a new page. I know I cannot be like some rich kids who realize their dreams overseas, and who have such a substantial financial background. At this moment, I just want to change my working enviroment. Ironically, Alice, the deputy editor in chief, came to me today just for one very article — When Nixon Met Elvis. She told me that she could not get the joke or meaning of the article. I explained to her and she insisted she didn’t think the article was interesting. Gosh, as my best friend said, she’s really not that sharp. I don’t think my other articles are fully appreciated either.
After working in the publication field in Canton, which claimed to have the "free" climate for freedom of speech, I grasped a number of DO’s and DONT’s though. If you ask me whether I like my job now, I would tell you YES and NO. I can’t wait to get out of here and take in some fresher breath. I hope I can look for jobs which are unrelated to publication, say an assitance of some consulates or press office.
Well, another downer is I just broke up with my good friend lately. The break-up feeling sucks! If I don’t turn to my friend, who else I should turn to? Right, only myself. God helps those who help themselves. I roughly counted I may have to give myself another two years to adjust a new working enviroment. By that time, I will be 26-7, an age very critical to Chinese female, as the visa officer would suspect you marry somewhere else instead of returning to your home country. That means, I have no chance to go abroad, but only hoping my financial circumstance would leap and provided me to live in a middle-class level as a city dweller.
Gees, no people connection with the society could really harm one’s life. But I really don’t have anyone whom can help to depend on, in fact, there is one. But my best friend can’t help much except to be a good listener. I don’t envy anyone who is living abroad, either studying or working now. To me, it is only others’ life but not mine. My fate will lead me eventually to where I should belong, I hope.
Looking for a new job–go for it! For the sake of a better single life.